Archive for May 10th, 2010

It’s YOUR Wedding – Not Your Vendors’!

Monday, May 10th, 2010

Let’s be real here: unless something amazingly unusual (like President Obama escorting the bride down the aisle) or really bad (like the cake giving all your guests food poisoning) happens at your wedding, do you really think any of your vendors (consultants, florists, decorators, music providers, etc.) are going to remember much about it – 10 or 20 years from now? When you consider that those same vendors will have worked hundreds of events since yours, it would be a very rare party professional indeed who would have anything more than a fleeting recollection of your ceremony and reception.

You, on the other hand, will remember everything – especially when your memories are aided by photos and video from the evening. Every future wedding you attend will only serve to reinforce (not blur) these recollections, as you compare what others do better, less well, or simply differently than you.

So who then, should be the ultimate decision-maker regarding your wedding? As you might guess, given the 2 paragraphs above, I vote for you. Vendors will never have the same emotional investment in your wedding that you do. And they will go on to other weddings the next day or following week. Your wedding is yours – forever.

So if any vendor tries to talk you into anything that busts your budget, or will add to the stress of an already-emotional day, you can and should exercise your power of the veto. It’s not “their” event – it’s yours. Any “statements” made there (by what you wear, where you choose as a venue, etc.) should reflect your tastes and bankroll, not the whims of a party professional seeking to advance their own agenda or career.

So sure – listen to their suggestions. And, especially when they draw on their years of experience to keep you from making what may be a costly (or needless) mistake, consider what they have to say. But ultimately, the real issue is whether they are the right vendors for you, not whether you are right for them. So you don’t ever have to do, say, or wear anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.

As long as you stay within your finances (and don’t break any laws), when it’s your wedding, your opinion trumps everybody.